


Taste The Artificially-Simulated Chemically Fruit-Flavored Candy Hemospectrum

by CurlicueCal, LaughingStones



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Intoxication, Reckless Destruction of Knitting, Skittles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-21
Updated: 2015-11-21
Packaged: 2018-05-02 18:18:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5258831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CurlicueCal/pseuds/CurlicueCal, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaughingStones/pseuds/LaughingStones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kanaya makes an important discovery.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Taste The Artificially-Simulated Chemically Fruit-Flavored Candy Hemospectrum

**Author's Note:**

> anonymous asked for Kanaya discovering skittles and embarking on an urgent quest to share them with everyone
> 
>  
> 
> we live to please :3

“Rose. Rose. I need to discuss something with you immediately.” 

Rose looked up from her knitting, one elegant eyebrow raised. “Is everything alright? You look rather flushed.”

“Do I?” Kanaya pressed one hand to her cheek, then shook her head impatiently. “Rose, you must help me. This is terribly important. Have you heard of the human candy called Skittles?”

The other eyebrow went up. “I have a passing familiarity, yes.”

Kanaya leaned forward intently, grabbing her hands. The knitting fell into disarray. “Rose. Have you been keeping this from me?”

“Have I been keeping the knowledge of a hard candy mostly comprised of chemicals extremely poorly disguised as fruit flavors from you?”

“Yes. Because I thought that you had an affection for me and now I am deeply concerned on this topic. Rose, you wouldn’t hide the existence of Skittles from me, would you?”

“Not if I had any notion of its importance to you.” Rose paused and looked Kanaya over more carefully. “Or possibly if I did. Are you quite certain you are feeling all right?”

“Yes, yes. Rose, stop getting side-tracked. You don’t seem to understand the vital import of this discovery.”

“Well, I am beginning to form the hypothesis that you have discovered some form of mind-altering chemicals. Am I close?”

“Mind-alter-- _ROSE_.” Kanaya leaned in until there was barely a breath of space between their faces. “Rose,” she said in almost a whisper. “ _I have tasted the rainbow._ ”

Rose blinked several times. Carefully. Her mouth opened once. She hesitated. “I can perhaps see why this would be appealing to you. Er. Did you actually see the commercials or have we discovered a marketing effort which transcends the boundaries of species and paradox space?”

“Rose, you are getting distracted, once again, from the important point. Skittles, Rose. We must share this discovery with everyone.”

Rose tilted her head, briefly transfixed by the vision of a meteor filled with extremely earnest and intoxicated aliens, all intently proselytizing the gospel of skittles. “I’m almost certain that’s a terrible idea.”

Kanaya somehow leaned closer. This was primarily accomplished by climbing into Rose’s lap. “It is the opposite of a terrible idea, Rose. It is the most important idea of our time. Besides, would you be so cruel as to keep this wonder all to ourselves?”

Considering her sudden lapful of enamored alien, Rose wondered precisely what wonder Kanaya was speaking of. Her earlier vision of intoxicated aliens took on some interesting new dimensions. “I am forced to consider exactly how cruel that might be,” she admitted.

Kanaya made a low, satisfied noise. It sounded something like a cricket deeply pleased with its life. And possibly intoxicated on Skittles.

Rose felt her face warm. She had excellent associations with that particular family of noises in the past. “Kanaya, dear. Do you think perhaps we might want to introduce a modicum of care and forethought into this venture? Perhaps… perhaps the world is not ready for so grand a revelation.”

Kanaya looked crestfallen. “Oh Rose, do you really think so? Do you think they couldn’t handle it yet? I was quite certain this would be an enjoyable experience for everyone.”

“Possibly too much so,” Rose said carefully.

“But then again, now that I consider, it is very probable that my own constitution is much stronger than most. It seems likely moderation is wise. We should only allow the others to have one or two skittles at best. I think a whole pack would be entirely too much for them.”

“Mmm,” Rose said non-committally. “And exactly how many have you been testing your constitution with?”

“Oh, goodness me. I’m not sure how many are in a pack. And I don’t remember how many packs are in a case. I do know I only discovered the two cases.”

“It is good to know the limits of our resources,” Rose said in a faint tone.

Kanaya beamed, bouncing slightly with her enthusiasm in a very distracting manner. “Oh no, I’ve already taken care of that. They alchemize quite nicely. And,” she added in a dreamy tone that Rose found rather ominous, “You can combine them with things.”

“Kanaya, my dear, you can combine most things with things, but that doesn’t make it a good idea.”

Kanaya pressed her nose firmly to Rose’s. “There are no bad ideas in Skittles, Rose.” Then she sat back, abruptly, looking Rose over with a new light of speculation in her eyes.

“Kanaya,” Rose said. “I forbid you to combine me with Skittles.”

Kanaya sighed wistfully. Her breath gusted across Rose’s face, perfumed with chemical fruit-flavoring. A delicate green flush still graced her cheekbones. Her eyes had that full, luminous quality Rose associated with an entirely different set of... activities. 

“Well. Possibly under very controlled conditions.”

Kanaya beamed and made the pleased cricket noise again.

Rose pulled her back down. 

Sometime later, Kanaya was forced to pause and rescue them from the tangled knitting.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Taste The Artificially-Simulated Chemically Fruit-Flavored Candy Hemospectrum by CurlicueCal & LaughingStones [Podfic]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13064406) by [Rhea314 (Rhea)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rhea/pseuds/Rhea314)




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